Do you believe that getting married on a Friday brings bad luck ? “Of course, why would Friday be an exception?”
 






A pregnant lady went to an astrologer. Astrologer: When u deliver a baby, baby’s father will die. Lady: Thank god! My husband is safe!
 



At a party, someone yelled: All married guys plz stand next to one person who has made ur life worth living. The bartender was almost crushed to death.
 



Suraj ki pahli kiran aapko Khusi de… Dusri kiran hasi de… Teesri tandurasti… Chouthi kamyabi… Bas ab aur nahi garmi lagegi. Good Day.
 



Ek Gujju ka sapne mein kisi ne rape kar diya di. Next day Gujju ne apna Bank acccount band karwa diya kyon ki Bank mein likha tha: Hum aap k Sapno ko Haqeeqat mein badal denge.
 



Amitabh: Mere pas Gaadi he, Banglaw hai, Bank Balance hai, tumhare paas kya hai? Shashi: Mere paas bhi Gaadi hai, Bunglaw hai, Bank Balance hai… Silence for few Minutes… Amitabh: Abey to phir Maa kahana hai?
 



Q: What time is it when most people go to the dentist? A: Tooth-Hurty!
 



Buffalo par baithe ek jaat koTRAFFIC police ne rok k puchha: Aap ka helmet kahan hai? Fine lagega. Jaat: Re baawale, dhayan se dekh Neeche, 4 wheeler hai !
 



Baap: Beta maine tere liye ek ladki dekhi hai, Vo Roopvati, Gunvati, or Sarasvati hai. Beta: Lekin papa mein kisi or se pyar karta hoon or vo.. Garbhvati hai.
 



Gandhigiri ki safalta ke baad, pesh hai. Messagegiri jisme aap msg kare ya na kare, ham msg bhejte rahenge, kabhi to aapko sharm aayegi. Gud Day!
 



Height of Marwari Kanjusi: Looking for a second Hand Tata Nano Car…….preferably with Gas Kit!!!
 



Hasi ke liye gam kurban, khushi ke liye aansoo kurban, dost ke liye jan bhi kurban, agar dost ki girlfreind mil jaye to saala dost bhi kurban.
 



Doctor to Lady: U r looking so weak and exhausted ! Are U properly taking 3 meals a day as I had advised ? Lady: Oh my God ! I heard 3 Males per day !
 



Doctor, cut off my dog’s tail. Vet: Why do u want to do that? Coz my mom-in-law is visiting us & I don’t want anything to make her think she’s welcomed.
 



Most of my friends are normal, sane, cultured, decent, intellectual & well-behaved persons… Just wanna thank you for breaking the monotony!
 



Police arrestd a drunkard & askd: Where r u goin? Man: I’m goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking. Cop: Who’ll lecture at midnite? Man: My wife…
 



Grammar Teacher: Rahul sharaab Nahin Peeta Hai. Is sentence mein Rahul kya hai? Pappu: Madam! Rahul chutiya hai…
 


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 Valentine special: Dunyia wich reh k rangaa wich kho jao.. Kise nu apna bana lao ya kise da ho jao.. Je kuchh vi ni hunda taan….Chakko Rajaai te so jao.