Their are moments in life when you really miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from your dreams..
 






Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.
 



Woman: The most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind!
 



Any woman that thinks the way to a mans heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too high.
 



For sale : Twin beds, one hardly used.
 



How do you save a man from drowning? Take yer foot of his head.
 



What did the drummer get on his IQ test? Drool...
 



Minds are like Parachutes. They work best when open.
 



Very funny Scotty. Now beam up my clothes.
 



Q: What is the thinnest book in the world? A: What Men Know About Women.
 



Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement ring, a wedding ring, and suffering.
 



Why'd the couple stop after 3 children? Cos they heard every fourth child born is chinese.
 



I'm late for work because the train driver had an out of body experience and didn't come back for a day and a half.
 



Several women appeared in court, each accusing the other of the trouble in the flat where they lived. The judge called for orderly testimony. "I'll hear the oldest first," he decreed. The case was closed for lack of evidence.
 



Q:What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend? A:About 45 pounds!!
 



Q: Why was the leper caught speeding? A: He couldn't take his foot of the accelerator.
 



Why don't men often show their true feelings? Because they don't have any. 1
 


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 God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested