Only once in your life u’ll get a right person with whom u’ll get married, so, till than keep enjoying with the wrong Ones! Gud Morning! Aap ye soch rahe honge ki Raat ko Gud Morning kaise? Simple! Phone mera, Paise mere, Msg mera, toh marzi bhi meri! Jo marzi aayega wo bhejunga.
 






Elephant falls in Luv with Ant, but Ant’s parents were against their marriage. Guess why? They gave a Solid Reason: Kehnde Munde de dand Bahar ne.
 



Pappu: Dad, mein biwi nu sms kita ki main Raat nu aunga, ghar aaya te kisi hor de nal suti si. Dad: Puttar galti mobile company di aa, jede time nal sms nahi bhejde!
 



Beauty isn’t measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear, but what we are inside. So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration! Janwaran di party chal rahi cee Chua 4 peg la ke set cee. Billi: J ajj party na hundi ta mai tenu ajj kha jandi. Chua: Ja tur ja saliye, loki kehan ge khadi piti wich janani kut diti.
 



I pray to God that any person who tries to fuck ur happiness, may his ass begin to itch & his hand grow shorter that he can’t reach his ass to scratch. Ek Tapori ki wife: Sunte ho ji, Apne chinku ne aaj pehla aadha shabd bola. Tapori: Achcha, Kya bola ? Wife: Behan…
 



He was a good man. He never smoked, drank & had no affair. When he died, the insurance company refused the claim. They said, he who never lived, cannot die! Ek samay ki bat hai, Mata Lakshmi ji ka ULLU unse rooth gaya aur bola, ‘Apki sab puja karte hain, mujhe koi nahin puchhta’ Lakshmi ji boli: Ab se har sal meri puja se 8-10 din pehle tumhari puja hogi. Us din Ullu puje jayenge. Tabhi se Diwali k pehle us din ko KARWA CHAUTH keh kar manaya jata hai!
 



10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidentsarer due to driving without drinking! Piyo Sar Utha Ke! How 2 catch squirrels? It’s simple. Just climb a tree & sit, Squirrels will come in search of U… U know Y? Coz They Love NUTS!
 



Keeping a place for me in ur heart is ok, but keeping a place for me in your mind mite be dangerous coz people say… I’m MIND BLOWING.
 



My Marriage is Fixed Surprisd? Dekho free di party da sun k kivein khush hunde ne.
 



Banta: How do you say Topless in Urdu? Santa: KHULE AAM…
 



The successful marriage depends on one simple equation: Wife having Beauty Secrets and husband having Secret Beauties.
 



There are only 5 things we need in life: Good friends, Good job, Good food, Good sleep & Good _ UCK. Whatever u are thinking… is right. Good Day.
 



Tum sab dost meri zindagi ho, aur aur aur aur aur Lahnat hai aisi zindagi pe!
 



True relatives always stand behind u during bad times. Check ur marriage album. All ur relatives were standing behind u!
 



Commerce joke: Do u know y in a couple’s photo man is on the right side & woman on the left? Because as per balance sheet liabilities are on left side and assets on right!
 



Girl anounced her engagement. Father: Does this fellow have any money? Girl: Oh! Daddy, U men are all alike, that’s exactly what he asked me about you!
 






 Some translations in Punjabi: Yo baby! Wassup? Ve kaka, a uttey ki tangeya va? Listen buddy, dat chick is mine! O bhaoo, o nikki kukree meri aa ! R u nuts? Tu akhrot an oye? Rock the party. VATTEY mar jashan ch. Lets hangout! Aja bahar lamkiye.